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Tag: LOL (page 1 of 2)

My Own Singapore Tourist Meme

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Received Your New iBanking Secure Device?

If you’re staring at the red one in the middle, you’re outdated la. Check out my latest iBank device on the extreme right. It is BIGGER, better, much much more secure (with a shitload of buttons making it impossible to hack), and most importantly, it provides extreme convenience. Now it’s so huge I won’t ever lose my ibank device again, YAY! 😀

Disclaimer: JOKE HOR, DBS. JOKE. Laugh lei.

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Bad Shop Names

Saw this at Little India earlier on, and I couldn’t help but take a photo.

Then, I thought of a photo going viral in Facebook a while ago.

Indian cum HAHAHAHAHA. (Photo credit: Eileena Lee.)

Someone please cum forth and take action prease. Stop approving all these kind of sai names lei.

1 hooman likes this.

Unfortunately, That’s How We Communicate

Hahahaha. It’s amazing how I found another shitty human being to talk shit to me.

Oh, look at the time. It’s 4am! I can now add on to the list, “I think of you when it’s 4am.” Right, time to sleep!

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I WANT TO BE A MAN

Woman asks: If I sleep with 3 men, everyone calls me a slut. But when a man sleeps with 8 girls, everyone calls him a real man. How come?

Confucius says: It’s very simple. When one lock can be opened by 3 different keys, it’s a bad lock. But when one key can open 8 different locks, we call it a master key.

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Pokemon in Real Life

This is fcuking hilarious shit!

Man, the Game Boy days. People from my era will know what I mean.

An Apple Evangelist’s Worst Nightmare


TIP OF THE DAY: DON’T DROP YOUR IPHONE! Tee hee!

1 hooman likes this.

All Kinds of Pads

The most useful gift ever muahahahaa.

I like mine soft and fluffy!

I’m talking about marshmallows here yo. Ha! Cuuuute right! Cousin Peimin bought these for me from Macau, and she says there’re even condom chocolates. WTF why so interesting one!!

Then during CNY visiting yesterday, I was playing Taboo with cousins, and my brother made history again.

For those who don’t know this game, basically you have to make people guess the word on the card through verbal description without using the five banned words below, which in this case, the given word was “PAD.”

My brother described it as, “You know the girl downstairs. Got blood. Then must use something.” ROFL. Everyone totally didn’t see that coming from him! I remembered last CNY, he was trying to describe the word “BUSH”, and he said something like “Your downstairs. Got a bunch. Black colour one.” *Palms face. So now you know, your downstairs is not necessarily your neighbour.

The last pad, iPads!

Owned by these five-year-old and four-year-old kids. I this forever twenty one also don’t have lor.

Zijie playing the piano and looking away at the same time. He likes to act cool like that! 😀

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Angel Orh-Pi-Sai

WAHAHAHA darn bo liao.

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Practise Safe Sex Man

What I meant was, making sure that your home is a safe place for your little ones to roam around.

My colleague told us about him witnessing this conversation on the MRT some other day.

Son: Mummy, I want to pee.

Mum: You gotta hold it there boy. There is no toilet here. We’ll go to one when we get off the train ok?

Son: Then mum, can I pee into your mouth?

Mum (shocked): HUH?? Why you want to pee into my mouth?!??!!!

Son: I saw Daddy peeing in your mouth last night.

The whole cabin went silent and stared at the lady.

OMGWTF AWKWARD MAX. Trust me, kids DO remember what they see. They might not know what is it at that moment, but the image will stay in the mind until they grow up and it’s quite traumatising I think. I’ll never wanna see my own parents banging each other. I know it sounds very crude but really what.

So please, keep that bedroom scene away from your kids! If not they see already anyhow spew nonsense in public you don’t know where to hide your face lor!

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